Sidestepping Love

During the middle of my busy summer I had a couple hours free on a Saturday and went with a few friends to see Brave at the theater. My complete exhaustion became apparent when I started bawling the moment I was afraid the mom wasn't going to turn back into her human form. If you haven't seen the movie (spoiler alert!), the mom and daughter don't get along and the mom gets turned into a bear. During this time the daughter and mother are able to work through their frustrations with each other and develop a close relationship. 

I really liked this idea of unintentionally developing a love for each other. When they were both human, this love was forced but by creating a situation in which they had to depend on each other in a world separate from their normal lives, this bond developed naturally. 

It isn't every day that someone in your life turns into a bear but there are relationships that build in this way all the time. For me this past summer, I was able to develop very close relationships with a few guys because we worked together as co-counselors at EFY. Our jobs worked as a distraction, taking away developing a relationship as a main objective and allowing the agenda it provided to be our focus while that love and relationship naturally grew on the side. 

It's totally the same thing as hanging out with your bear mom.

I copied down a line I liked off of HIMYM a few months back onto this post:

"Friendship is an involuntary reflex. It just happens. You can't help it."

I like that idea.. that when you're not trying to force something, especially something as important as friendship, it develops naturally and beautifully. 

I also like the twist I added to this post today while looking for an image to go with it---

We can love by learning to see someone perfectly instead of only looking for perfection in the first place. I'm far from perfect and that's why I need others to take the time to see my imperfect self perfectly and love me for that.

As I assess this concept in my own life I am able to add my own amen! to it validity. There are a couple people who I tried to force a loving relationship with which ended in failure. Once those alternative activities entered our relationship I was suddenly able to work by them side-by-side as a friend and learn to love them so much deeper than I could before. 

Whether it's your mom or a co-counselor or one of your closest friends that you never knew you could love so much, it's a great way to develop that relationship with them.