Living to Our Full Potential

Inception:
Cobb: I can't stay with her anymore because she doesn't exist. 
Mal: I'm the only thing you do believe in anymore. 
Cobb: I wish. I wish more than anything. But I can't imagine you with all your complexity, all you perfection, all your imperfection. Look at you. You are just a shade of my real wife. You're the best I can do; but I'm sorry, you are just not good enough. 


This quote was shared in a church meeting Sunday and I quite like it. There are so many branches of discussion I could write about based off of this quote and I've decided to choose the topic of living to our full potentials. The other day I had a conversation about some people knowing exactly what they want in life. It was a short conversation but I'd like to expound. 


There are people in this world that know exactly what they want. Maybe not exactly, but they know the main points of what they want for their futures. Kudos to them. For those people there is always the fear that although they know what they want, they may give that up in the future. How tragic would it be for someone who has definitive plans for the future to simply walk away from those things and settle for something else? 


Extremely tragic.


Yet, it happens all the time.


Why?


Because....


Because we lose faith in ourselves. Faith in others. Faith in the world. Faith in God. We fight and fight and fight for the things we want and eventually reach a point of exhaustion and give up. Sometimes we don't even fight before we walk away. Sometimes we reach the conclusion that what we want is not an option. That we must settle for only a ghost of what we are really looking for. 


STOP it. If you are wanting great things, you will get them. It may take a lot of work. A lot of time. A lot of faith. BUT... you will get them. There are exceptions to every situation but if you want to be a multi-millionaire some day, DO it! If you want to marry that perfect someone that you've been dreaming about for years, FIND them! If you are adamant about living in Arizona for the rest of your life, SET that expectation. Do NOT settle for a shadow of your potential. 


Remember: I can't imagine you with all your complexity, all you perfection, all your imperfection. Look at you. You are just a shade of my real wife. You're the best I can do; but I'm sorry, you are just not good enough. 


Know that you ARE good enough to get what you want. Know that what you want is an option without settling for a ghost of your dreams. Don't reach the point where you simply give up. Always fight.

I Thank God For Unanswered Prayers

Everyone has prayed, in some form or another, for things that they really want. 

Those prayers aren't always answered. Not because there's no one listening but maybe because we're the ones who need to listen. 

What are some of my unanswered prayers? Oh, you know me, I wanted to be married right out of high school at the age of 17. I wanted to move far far away from Arizona where plants were a real color of green. I wanted people around me to change. I wanted a perfect family with an older brother or twin sister I could discuss life business with. I wanted boys who were emotionally destructive to marry me. 

Thank God for unanswered prayers.

I've spent a lot of time in my life looking back at the past- not always like Lot's wife... longing for what I once had.. but more to analyze where I've been and see how my choices and life events have affected who I am today. 

I thank God for unanswered prayers. Those unanswered prayers have created a life that I never dreamed I could have. A life in which I'm happier than I have ever been. 

There's a reason for everything and sometimes, that reason takes years to become apparent.

And sometimes, it's totally worth the wait.

The Big Gesture Conquers Unrealistic Love

One of the movies I have in my collection is Chasing Liberty- - while it is not a favorite I still enjoy watching it ever so often although that may mainly be due to a beautiful man named Matthew Goode. 

Whatever the reason, I like a concept that Ben (aka Goode) points out in the movie:

Ben: My mother wanted him to make the big gesture.

Anna: What’s the big gesture? 

Ben: You know, “I’ll quit for you. I’ll stay home for you, darling.” But he didn’t. Because…Well, people don’t really do that, do they?

DO THEY???

While researching this topic (you didn't know I usually spend time researching my topics, did you?) I found a blog post that I found to be a fantastic conversation. Seriously, read it. It expresses my thoughts perfectly. 

Read it. NOW. Then come back and continue reading. 

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The only part I would change a little bit is that the idea of a big gesture is not necessarily a one time thing. I'm not saying it should be a constant thing, but everyone deserved a big gesture every once in a while. The periods between these big gestures should still be supported with simple gestures. 

So, what is a big gesture? In my mind, it's not necessarily someone giving up their entire life for you. I see it more as a special effort made by someone that shows how much they really care and pay attention to you who are. 

If you really like someone- get creative and do something that will blow their mind.

Ex: Ride a tandem bike around a lake until, surprise! you discover a projector, screen, and couch set up [magically!] all ready to watch a movie. 

Did that set up take a little bit of work and planning? Yes. Was it all worth it? Yes!

Don't sell yourself short with taking the easy way out all the time. 

So... what sparked my desire to write a post on this topic?

One of my friends was sharing how since she missed the last two Harry Potter premiers she wants a guy to recreate the midnight showings at home for her- the movie starts at 12, dressing up, movie popcorn...

Is that unrealistic? Absolutely not. 

Guaranteed, no one is going to know that is something she wants unless she says something but the concept is still valid. 

It's not that the date is expensive or took forever to plan out... it's that someone cared enough to find out what kind of big gesture she would appreciate. 

Now, like I said before, a big gesture is not necessary every minute of every day. It's all the little things in between that really count too. It can be as simple as opening the sun roof so the one you love can look at the stars. Difficult? Nah.. Just something that shows that you paid attention to what they care about.

This leads me to my last section of this post: 

unrealistic love

Everyone at one point of time or another has dreamed up their own fairy tale. 

We're trained to do so-- from Disney movies to chick flicks to most everything else in our world...

We want to have fairy tales.

I'm here to tell you that to a certain point, they exist.

We still live in reality but as seen above, big (and little) gestures can and should be made.

We have every right to dream in reality.

While they don't actually kiss in this clip below, this is what I always dreamed my first kiss would be.

Ya know... the pale sunset.. the quiet music in the background.. a lovely (at that time) outfit slightly swaying in the cool evening breeze..

And because I'm a huge dreamer, I added fireworks to that list.

Why? 

So that when we kissed there would literally be fireworks.

Hahahahahahahahhahahaha I embarrass myself. 

But truly... I believe in fairy tales. I believe in perfect moments- even if they're perfect in their own way.

They won't necessarily happen for a first kiss..

But they can happen.

Dream in reality.

You Are My Sunshine

How many of us have heard this song? Hopefully everyone.. it's fairly common. It's usually sung to people we love whether that be significant others or children. I love this song.. I really do. I vaguely remember having a sun pillow as a kid that when you squeezed it the chorus would play. As I was singing this song in my head this weekend I decided to blog about it-- fairly unsure of where the post would go. Well, after looking up the lyrics to the other verses the song I was fairly concerned and found the direction for this post.

You Are My Sunshine
My only sunshine.
You make me happy
When skies are grey.
You'll never know, dear,
How much I love you.
Please don't take my sunshine away

Fairly normal, right? This person loves someone and they don't want to ever lose them. Awww.. tender! But then it goes to this-

The other nite, dear,
As I lay sleeping
I dreamed I held you in my arms.
When I awoke, dear,
I was mistaken
And I hung my head and cried.

Okay, so they've already lost the person.. whether literally through death or just a social/emotional break. It's heart wrenching but nothing too far out there. Next:

I'll always love you
And make you happy
If you will only say the same
But if you leave me
To love another
You'll regret it all some day;

Okay let's not sound like a TOTAL psycho-who-will-kill-you kind of person... sheesh! Now let's head to the depressing verse:

You told me once, dear
You really loved me
And no one else could come between
But now you've left me
And love another
You have shattered all my dreams;

I really don't so much know what to say about this song other than I think whomever wrote it needed to eat some Ben and Jerry's and move on. Apparently their form of Ben and Jerry's was a classic hit song to sing to children. 


I vote we just forget the rest of the verses and pretend this is still a pretty little love song. 


You are my sunshine... my only sunshine.. you make me happy when skies are gray... I won't kill you... or have an emotional break down... unless you take my sunshine away :)

I believe in being honest, TRUE, chaste...

True: In accordance with fact or reality; accurate or exact; loyal or faithful

I think one of the greatest challenges in life is to be true. True in your actions. True in your thoughts. True to who you are. 

We've all heard the phrase "true love"

True Love: Princess Bride

But what is true love?
When I think of "true love" I automatically attribute the definition "a serious connection with the perfect person for you."

But that's not it AT ALL.

True love.. is fact. Reality. It is a connection with someone accurate to who you are. It is being entirely committed. Entirely loyal. Entirely faithful. Entirely TRUE to who you are and using that complete honesty in a relationship.

How often are we entirely true in our relationships? Almost never. People think they are- they think that they are entirely honest and can share everything and accept everything someone else says but even in my own life I've discovered how much courage it takes to be true in a relationship and very far I still am from doing so.

But the term "true" is not all about love.

Being true to one's self may cause you to ask the questions:

Who am I?
Do I live my life true to who I am or does how I live make me who I am?

Being true to yourself is about being entirely honest- honest with yourself and honest in your actions.
Do you admit to yourself the real answers that you may already have to some of your questions?
Are you brave enough and true to yourself enough to make choices according to what you believe?
Do you know who you are?

Maybes.

Using myself as an example-
Who am I?
I am Spiderman. Jk. Moving on..

I am a daughter of God who belongs to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. 
How may I be true to that? I may take action. I may have sincere prayers and sincere periods of scripture study. I may live my life in a way that follows God's teachings. I may seek after things that are virtuous and lovely and of good report. I may make what I know to be the right choice even when the opposite is much more enticing at the moment. I may know.. really know that what I believe is correct.

But am I true? Do I do those things? Am I who I claim to be?

I am a romantic.
And how may I be true to this? I may put forth an effort to date and incorporate myself into that world. I may actually believe in a happily ever after rather than just writing about it and dreaming that someday it could actually happen while never actually truly believing it. I could make the effort on my part to be the kind of person that the guy I want to marry some day would fall in love with.

I am happy.
I don't mean this as a temporary adjective. I mean this as a part of who I really am. We are all designed to be happy.. unfortunately there are events thoughts that take place in our lives that attempt (and often succeed) to convince us otherwise. If I am happy.. then to be true to myself I should always seek to find that part of myself- in everything I do and say and live.

I am the author of Dreaming in Reality.
I write things that not only inspire and educate myself, but sometimes do that for others. I love knowing that something simple that I love to do has made small differences in lives. It's not much-- but it is something. Since I am an author then I should be putting an honest effort into posts. I should be paying attention to those around me and using those things, along with my thoughts, to create a piece of inspiration.

I'm a lot of things.. 

Am I true in all that I do? No.. But it is something I can be better at and always strive to be aware of.

"TRUE" gets skipped over a lot as a common word attributed with many different things but not often having it's own stand.

Give it a shining moment in your life.

The Mind of God

Last weekend I went up to Salt Lake City to attend General Conference in the Conference Center. It's not like you have to go all the way up there to watch/hear it but sometimes it's nice to be in the same room as the speakers. 

One of the talks Sunday morning was on the topic of aligning our will with God's. Robert D. Hales said, "Too often we pray for patience but we want it right now." 

One of the biggest things we have to realize in our lives is that things work out a lot better if we align our will/desires with what God has planned for us.

This isn't because our lives change-- it's because our perspective changes.

You see, things work out a lot better if you aren't constantly fighting them.

I had a friend contact me Sunday night who was perplexed due to a situation in their life in which something they wanted- which is a good thing- is not going as planned/hoped for. They asked for my advice on what plan of action they should now follow. 

I shared a personal experience in my life in which something I really really want was not going as planned/hoped for, similar to what this friend is going through. 

I shared how this thing I wanted- which is a good thing- was denied to me. 

It would have broken my heart if I didn't have a firm belief in a divine plan that has been created for me.

You see, even though in my mind I saw this desire as a good thing to have in my life, God didn't at that time. 

BUT.... I trust that God has a plan for me. A plan that is so fantastically wonderful that I can't even dream up something that perfect. If I align my will with His, I will be happy and will some day receive the blessings of that wonderful plan. If we have such a small view of our lives, why not trust the person who can see the entire picture?

A big part of this whole trusting in God/aligning our plans with his has to do with timing. I wrote a little bit about this a while ago in a post titled Right Time... Right Place. In the situation I shared with my friend, even though the thing I wanted was a good thing, it was the wrong timing. It's not that it was the wrong thing for me.. it's that it was the wrong thing at the time.
But now it's the right time. Why? Because I had something (or many things) I needed to learn first and now that I've learned them I'll be okay.

It's a great source of peace knowing that during the troubling times of your life (and all the other times too) that God has a plan for you. He knows your potential and will put people and situations into your life designed specially for you. TRUST that he will do that. TRUST that when you feel like your world is crashing down around you that He will always be there making sure you'll work your way through it. TRUST that there is something beautiful and wonderful in your future that is greater than anything you could ever imagine.

I did. I do. It's made all the difference.

And ya know what? I am happier now than I have ever been in my entire life.

Being Together Forever

My favorite TV show- and the only one I watch regularly- is named Castle. I REALLY REALLY like it. Last night as I was catching the end of an episode on my new TV (yes, I can watch tv at home now!) I had a thought come to mind.... the general population is more interested in eternal love that we often care to admit.

The episode last night (spoiler alert!) was about a woman who killed her husband who had a brain tumor so that he could be cryopreserved before his brain blew up. The episode ended with her consuming a cyanide pill in order to join him. 

Psycho? Maybe...... I feel like her actions along with cryopreservation are kinda out there but yet, they're not at all. 

People want to be with the ones they love forever. It's seen in several things in our world whether we're talking about cryopreservation or Bella Swan becoming a vampire. 

People give up their lives (literally or fictionally) in order that they might be together forever. 

The great thing is-- being with the ones you love forever is the way things are supposed to work. If such is the case, you may ask then why we don't live forever.... 

Well, we do.

I'm a huge fan of reading short little quotes or "funny" lines. 

One of my favorites is, "You don't have to be a vampire to live forever"

How?? Well, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormon) has it figured out.

In temples- those beautiful white buildings that only worthy members enter into- you can be sealed to the ones you love forever. 

It's possible because the power of God (the priesthood) has been restored to this earth and is given to worth men. 

You can have what the world is constantly searching for an answer to. 

It's real.. It's true.. It's forever.