Single Syndrome

There comes a time in almost every relationship blog and life of a young single adult when the question "Why aren't you married?" comes up. 

HERE IT IS!!

This version will be based off of the past 4 weeks of my life working at EFY.

It started the very first night before we (meaning- the counselors) even had our kids when we were reunited with our session director from the year before. To a girl I worked with this year and last year he said, "Hey, good to see you again this year! Why are you still here? Why aren't you married?" Later that first week one of my 14-year-old girls walked up to me one evening and very seriously asked, "Do you wonder if you'll ever get married?" I see comments all over the Facebook walls of other counselors saying, "You need to get married!" and hear that phrase or "They're so amazing.. Why aren't they married?" echoing through conversations during the week. During a long walk on the beach with a friend one night I semi-seriously joked about never finding anyone to marry and got the response of, "AMANDA!!! YOU'RE 21!!!!" I endure endless comments from my children telling me how perfect my co-counselor and I would be together while they force us to dance and arrange our future together. I was even engaged for 24-hours this week to one of my closest friends and co-counselor..

This topic of joy and concern already appears rather frequently in my life but has increased dramatically as my job has put me in an environment where such is overwhelmingly prevalent. 

Let me make this a little more personal-- I was a boy-crazy girl all through school.. eager to fall in love with the unrealistic expectation that I would be married at age 17-- right after I graduated high school. Starting college single, I laughed at that notion and continued with my boy-crazy habits. I stuck with a few different boys for a couple months at a time but never found a place I felt I truly belonged. Something changed that last year of college and I took relationships a lot more seriously but a permanent relationship did not result. People keep asking me, "Amanda.. why aren't you married?"

My answer: I thought I would be by now. It never fully occurred to me that I would make it all the way though a bachelors degree without at least coming close to that point in my life.

So.. why do I bring all of this up? Well, to vent of course. That's what this blog is for-- to relieve stress from my mind and share it with all of you. I bring this up because I want to put a different light on this topic than is usually read or seen. I'm not going to repeat the "wo is me... so 'old' and am not yet married with 3 babies.." or "I don't need a man in my life because I'm independent and can be happy without a husband." Gross.. let's leave those nauseating narrations for spam. 

No.. I wanted something different. I wanted to find something new on this exhausted subject and for the past week I've been looking for that something. I liked a status one of my girls from last year posted on Facebook:

"One day you'll realize that even though you're not perfect, someone truly loves you for who you really are." ~Sydney

I like that thought.. but it just doesn't invoke the passion I need to write a good post.

My search ended during a morningside on Thursday taught by Brother Larson in which we listened to a song off the EFY CD for this year: Arise and Shine.

The song is titled 'My Story' and I've been so kind to not only provide a YouTube link, but write out all the lyrics:

My Story

When I was a little girl I read fairy tales and wondered if they could happen to me

Now I see this is my once upon a time

I am the daughter of a King

And with every choice that I make

I write the next page

I don't know all the twists and the turns

but my journey is clear

I'm a child of infinite worth

There's a reason I'm here

I'll follow the path that's before me

This is my story

There are days when it seems the road in front of me is falling apart and I can't find my way

But I learned how to rely on the burning light that I have within me and I find faith to move forward until I can see just where it leads

CHORUS

Through every chapter my Father's love helps me know who I am

My ever after is a beautiful part of His bigger plan

CHORUS

Ohhhhh This is my story


Here's where you can download songs from the CD for free with this code: 4363742

I really like the two lines I underlined. It occurred to me that I need to stop trying to plan out every little detail of my life and just let it happen. I'm not saying give up on making decisions, just stop being so stressed out about it and let the little twists and turns happen without needing to predict them first. When I graduated from ASU people began demanding an answer for my plans so I came up with "taking a semester off" and went with it. The more I think about it the more excited I am for a semester to do all the things I never have time for and let my story write itself without me painfully forcing the words. I'm excited to discover all the twists and turns that will surely appear along the way and the great thing is, I know where I want to end up and the general path I need to get there so I'm going to let my story write itself. I know that God will give me my fairy tale if I allow Him to do so.

Sorry if this post was still a little on the same cliche and repetitive list..