Un'amica stretta

I was chatting with a couple friends the other day about how you would define a best friend and as I was reading a book last night my interest on the subject was piqued once again.

Whenever I think of best friends my initial thoughts jump to jewelry pieces with "best" on one half and "friend" on the other. I think of FB pictures that my teenage EFY girls have written "best friends!!!" all over and posted on their profile. The picture above is actually of 2 of my favorite girls who I'll add my amen to the fact that they are indeed, best friends. I had the opportunity of having Tabby in my group my first summer at EFY and then having both of them in my group the second summer. I got to observe their incredible friendship and take part in it myself for a wonderful week.

But what is it about their relationship that defines them as best friends? I went to a few of my favorite experts to get a little more information: Wikipedia, Wikihow, and Urban Dictionary. Totally accurate sources, I know.

On Wikipedia I was reminded of the several types of friendship that exist. I've listed a few of the more common ones along with a few I appreciated because of their title--

Associate, bloke, blood brother (or sister), Bromance, Buddy, friends with benefits, family friend, comrade, Frenemy, imaginary friend, internet relationship, mate, opposite-sex friendship, pen pal

Whew! and those are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to relationships.

As for telling me about what a best friend is specifically, Wikipedia kinda failed me so I moved on.

Wikihow was slightly more helpful. They even have a page that gives you step-by-step instructions on How To Be A Great Best Friend.

But still, not what I was looking for. 

Urban Dictionary it is. This is where I hit the jackpot. My wiki pages are great for strictly informational matters but Urban Dictionary has the raw thoughts of real people and who better to ask?

Here's what the people of Urban Dictionary had to say about what a best friend is:

• the first person you think about when you make plans
• the first person you go to when you need someone to talk to
• the first person you call when something great happens or when something horrible happens
• someone you can talk to about nothing or the most important things in your life
• when you're sad they will try their best to cheer you up
• shoulder to cry on
• take a bullet for you
• someone you trust your life with
• someone you always remember no matter what happens
• gives you the opinion you care most about
• tells you what you need to hear whether you want to hear it or not
• someone you can always be around and never get sick of
• someone you don't envy
• someone you are grateful to have as a friend
• someone who will always forgive you
• someone you can be totally yourself around

"The best friend in your life is the person you are thinking about as you read this."

I think they did a pretty good job of summarizing the characteristics of a best friend but I still felt like I was missing the answer as to what a best friend really IS.

I love what Eat, Pray, Love has to say about this:

"...un'amica stretta means "a close friend." But stretta literally means tight, as in clothing, like a tight skirt. So a close friend, in Italian, is one you that can wear tightly, snug against your skin..."

I think she meant to write, "one that you" but hey our brains are trained to put the words in the right order anyways, right? So no big deal.

I like the idea that a best friend is someone who is so close to you that they're practically a part of who you are. They're their own self but also very much a part of yourself that completes you.

They're the one who you complete your thoughts and ideas with.

They're the one who shares the majority of your time.

 They're the one who fills your gaps and you feel you can share your vulnerabilities with.

They're the person who when you can't be everything you want to on your own, they take on the rest.

Of course everyone has their own imperfections and a best friend is as human as anyone else so they're not going to be a literal superhero but most of the time it still seems like mine are to me.

I'm incredibly grateful for the few people in my life that I consider to be my best friends and can't imagine any better of a gift from God.